So here are two new images of the Avengers team appearing in the new Entertainment Weekly.  Quite frankly, they suck.  If any of you superhero film geeks out there had a hard-on for this movie, these photos are the equivalent of taking a cold shower with Paula Dean while she scarfs down an entire pot roast.

To help make sense of these photos, I figured I’d provide the thoughts that each actor must’ve been thinking for their cover photo.  Hopefully, it explains and justifies why they look the way they do.  Look at the pictures if you wish.  You’ve been warned…

THOUGHTS OF THE HEROES:

Chris Hemsworth: “Yeah, I’d hit that.”

Scarlett Johansson: “Try and hack my cell phone photos now, bitch.”

Robert Downey, Jr: “Let me dust off my ‘cocaine in a motel’ mugshot look for this.”

Jeremy Renner: “I get my own spinoff film if I do this, right?”

Chris Evans: “Don’t fart, don’t fart, don’t fart.”

Mark Ruffalo: “You want Magnum or Blue Steel?  Wait, what do you mean this isn’t the Zoolander sequel?”

CLICK THE LINKS BELOW TO CHECK OUT:

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